Alcohol and entrepreneurship often go hand-in-hand, but they don't have to.
Last year, I wrote a post about how I was cutting back on my caffeine intake, and how it was a bit challenging at the start. Once I got through the initial withdrawal symptoms, it got easier. Truth be told, I was quite surprised at how my body was addicted to a certain level of caffeine each day.
In that article, I included a link to another article I wrote some years ago about how I gave up drinking alcohol. Making that change from drinker to non-drinker is something that I'm extremely proud of, especially because I never thought it would be something I'd ever do. Ever.
Alcohol played a massive role in my social life, and I explore that topic a bit more in that article. However, what I didn't fully address in that post, and what should be addressed, is the role alcohol often has in entrepreneurship.
Why I Can Speak on This Topic
I've been an entrepreneur my entire life. After more than a decade of trying different ventures, I finally found success in LearnDash. Shortly after its launch, I left my corporate career to do it full-time. I went from being on the road every week to living and working from home. No more office, no more boss. I was free!
In my first week of freedom, I got drunk around 2PM each day. My life felt surreal, I was in my 20s, and I was in “vacation mode”. That didn't last, though. After the first week, I got my shit together and wouldn't drink during working hours, but I would soon come to see that the theme of alcohol remained.
From the very beginning of my first entrepreneurial success, alcohol played a significant role. Whether it was to celebrate, to mark the end of the day, or to network, it became a pillar of my experience. Since I was working at home, I didn't know how to get out of “work mode” unless I was cracking open a beer.
More often than not, I didn't drink to get a buzz, but rather to just “relax”. However, as the years went on, I felt that I needed to disconnect even more. Business life was stressful, and my personal life wasn't any better. So, I self-medicated. When drunk, suddenly those things didn't feel as emotionally intense.
From Bad to Real Bad
In a scary turn of events, alcohol eventually stopped being a tool to disconnect for me, and I started to equate it to some of my business success.
Looking back, that is when I can say that my relationship with alcohol changed for the worse.
I'd tell myself that it was important that I drink because it helped me to network. I did strike some amazing deals in the late hours of the night at a hotel bar with other entrepreneurs (at conferences, for example), so I attributed that success to my drinking.
What I didn't see at the time was that this wasn't due to the alcohol, it was due to me as a person. I always struggled to give myself the full credit I deserved, and by putting alcohol up on a pedestal in this way, I made it near impossible to quit drinking. I was telling myself that if I quit drinking, I wouldn't be successful.
So, I continued with my unhealthy pattern. Alcohol wasn't for special occasions anymore. It was part of my personality, my success, my way of life. I took a keen interest in different whiskeys. I thought I was being “cultured” by knowing flavor profiles and making recommendations to friends and family, or when networking. In reality, I was cementing alcohol into the definition of who I was. I was proud of this useless whiskey knowledge.
But here's the thing: as the years went on, I became more isolated than ever before. Something that was meant to be done in a social setting became the reason I chose not to go out or interact with anyone. Sitting at home, knocking back half a bottle to disconnect became more appealing. I was spiraling, and I knew it.
Hitting My Rock Bottom
As it is often said, you need to really hit your rock bottom before you are ready for a change. It has to be personal, and really rattle you to your core.
For me, that moment came in 2019. The specifics of which, in reality, don't matter. If you're drinking heavily (or even more than you know you should), and you read about my rock bottom, then your mind will justify how your situation is different. It will protect your ego, and therefore your habit. I know, because that's what I used to do. My story is not personal to you, and it has to be personal.
What does matter is that when I hit my rock bottom, I was a mess. I cried. I screamed at myself. Most importantly: I never wanted to feel that way ever again.
That day I decided to quit drinking. I didn't know what to do, so I wrote for three or four hours straight in a journal – just a pen and paper. I wrote about the issue I had, why I hated myself for it, how I needed to get better, my insecurities, the direction my life was going in, and where I wanted to go.
When I wasn't writing, I read this book and listened to this audiobook. And I finally admitted to my therapist that I had a problem.
Every day, I wrote in that journal (for months on end). I stopped drinking cold turkey, because there is really no other way. I tried them all, and let me tell you something: it was fucking hard. Trying to limit yourself, for example, won't work because the contract you make with your sober self is different when you're negotiating with your drunk self.
"I missed having a buzz. I missed numbing my emotions."
No one really talks about this, but it was exhausting to be with my own thoughts 24/7. I was going to bed at 8:30PM because of how tired I was without my usual escape. I experienced daily “thought fatigue” as I processed my emotions.
But as time went on, I got used to being with my thoughts. I enjoyed better sleep. I lost weight. Furthermore, I regained confidence. I also made more money (the opposite of what I thought would happen).
What this time gave me was evidence that all the preconceived notions that I had about alcohol, all the lies, were fabricated to reinforce a life-destroying addiction.
I still don't drink alcohol, and I'm not even remotely tempted by it. I am 100% present in life, and I'm always in control and clear-headed. Furthermore, I sleep great. I'm the healthiest I've ever been from a physical standpoint, and as an added bonus, I no longer have to lie to my doctor when asked how many drinks I have per week!
Alcohol and You
My story is not unique. Far from it, actually. Perhaps you too are struggling with something similar. Maybe you don't think your drinking is as bad as mine was, but I can promise you that if you continue down your current path, it will be.
Because that's what addictions do. They start small, then they snowball, and before you know it, your new “normal” is no longer normal to the outside world. It's cliché as hell, but the first step in all of this is to recognize that the problem exists. You can't regulate it. Setting “drink limits” never works, and you know it.
If you say to yourself, “I don't have a problem”, then there's a very good chance you have a problem. You're already rationalizing. That's how it begins.
Many people would disagree with me on that, and I understand. If that's you, then I have a challenge for you: stop drinking for six months, today. Throw away all the alcohol in your house.
If you immediately rejected that possibility, think about why. What excuses came to your mind to rationalize why you don't need to do that? If you didn't have a dependency, then you would have no problem giving it up for six months. That's a fact.
If you said to yourself, “I could do that, no problem,” then prove it. Otherwise, you're just lying to yourself again.
Look, I'm just being honest, because your mind will do everything in its power to lie to you about this. I know, because I told myself all the same rationale. It's because you've had years upon years of conditioning. Alcohol is part of your pastimes, your friend group, your business life, and more—but it doesn't have to be. In fact, it shouldn't be.
Think about it this way: there is no bad outcome when you stop drinking alcohol. Not one. In fact, quite the opposite. It's all gain, and then some. I can attest to that.
You're Stronger than You Know
I know you can give up alcohol, you're just as strong as anyone else who has done the same. As an entrepreneur, you don't put up with excuses in your business. It's time to apply that same philosophy to your relationship with booze.
That said, you don't have to do it alone. If you find having a support group helps, then there are plenty. You can read books (like the ones I mentioned earlier), listen to podcasts, post on Reddit, talk to a therapist, or whatever you need to help you build momentum and stay committed. The resources are there waiting for you.
Step 1 is making that commitment and “saying it out loud”.
If you need someone safe to say it to, then you can email me.
#entrepreneurship #health
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