40
I made it.
I considered not even writing anything today, I think in part because I wish to just treat today like any other day. I feel old, not in spirit, but in the eyes of my younger self.
I remember quite vividly being 22 years old and meeting someone who was 30 when working an internship in college. They seemed so old to me. Like, they were married and well into their career... and they were only 30!
Never did I think I'd make it to this point. It was always a “grown up” number. The “you're officially old” age. Yet, here I am, and If I'm honest, it freaks me out that there is now a “4” in front of my age now, because I don't feel old.
I am Grateful
One of my favorite quotes is by Mark Twain:
“Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.”
I see just how much weight these words carry now, especially as I think about the people in my life that are no longer around, but should be.
I am so incredibly grateful to be alive. I am grateful for the life that I lived in my 20s, because by the time I reached my 30s, I felt like I was ready to enter into adulthood. My 30s had both the absolute worst days and best days of my life. I am grateful for both, because they have given me the growth and perspective that only come with age.
The Future
I don't know what the future holds for me, but that's nothing new. In fact, that's one of the lessons I've learned: stop planning life because ultimately we control nothing. My life to this point has gone a path that I would have never predicted.
What I do know is that I will continue to grow and learn. I'll live with an open heart, compassion & empathy, and love – for both myself and those around me. Every day is a reminder of just how lucky I am.
So here's to another decade. I hope that I'm lucky enough to reach 50.
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