mindfulness — 🌐 Justin's Blog

Beauty in Stillness

June 7, 2022

When I was a kid, my parents enrolled me into sports year-round. In the fall I was playing soccer, winter basketball, spring was baseball and soccer, and in the summer I went to soccer camps.

There was a method to this madness. Truth is, I was a pretty mischievous kid and easily found trouble if my time wasn’t filled (even with all these sports, I still managed to drive my parents crazy 😆).

The sports let me spend my energy productively, and aside from filling my time, I learned about setting goals, how to deal with disappointment, discipline, how to get along with others, how to show respect, and how to follow directions.

I took this same “be busy” attitude into my teenage years and early adulthood. It served me well. But it wasn’t until I was a little older, wiser maybe, that I started to reflect upon this “fill my time” culture and realized that, despite its upsides, it has some pretty troubling downsides as well.

Choose Nothing

Doing nothing and just “being” is a valid, arguably more productive use of time.

Perhaps it’s an American thing, or a Western Culture concept, but it seems like we dislike “idle time”. We fill it with tasks, activities, apps, and projects.

There is nothing inherently wrong with any of these things. Everyone needs something to keep them mentally sharp. But what about those times in your life when you don’t have anything planned?

Instead of filling that time, or stressing about an expectation to do something, what if you left that time empty instead, giving yourself permission to not do anything?

I have learned to do this over the past few months, and while it’s not always easy, I think it has been a net positive for my mental well-being. When I am not thinking about “future land”, I am forced to live in the present. I have the opportunity to appreciate the ones I am with, and to fully capture the little moments. I am fully appreciating the gift of time.

Don’t Make Plans

Have you ever tried not to plan out a day and then to live that day with a present mindset? It’s harder than you think!

Look, I get it, planning our days and weeks makes us feel like we are productive, and feeling productive makes us feel good. I’m not implying that being busy is a bad way to live your life. However, it just can’t be the only way to live.

You may find something else difficult about not making plans for one day: it won’t stop other people from trying to fill your day with plans! This can actually be a little overwhelming, but remember that you are in control of your time. Put up a boundary and stick to it.

Live in the current moment with your “no plan” day. If you’re tired, take a nap. If you’re bored, read a book for a bit. Go for a walk. Get a little exercise if you feel up for it. Finally, spend some time just sitting. Reflect and/or meditate. Just be at peace.

You don’t have to be alone during this time. Enjoy the company of others. Have a meal with friends or family. Play with your kids. Embrace the beauty of living with intention and in the moment.

Most importantly: don’t stress about the future because that isn’t guaranteed anyhow. And don’t dwell on the past because what’s done is done.

Just be present and grateful for the time that you have. You will find that without all of that extra weight on your mind, you will have more energy when you return to your planning ways!

#mindfulness

Time Under Tension

July 19, 2021

Time under tension builds character, but it can also be dangerous. Here is how I deal with stress.

If you have ever lifted weights, then you probably have heard about “time under tension”. The longer your muscles are under tension in an exercise, the more strength you can gain.

But I’m not talking about weight lifting… I’m talking about life. Similar to the gym, time under tension in our lives is good. Instead of muscle, it builds character and perseverance. We find out who we are when we are living out days under tension.

I usually thrive under pressure. That’s not to say that I like it. I don’t. I prefer things to be going smoothly in life, just like anyone. Yet, there are always stressful times and I seem to find a way to rise above it mentally to get things done – whatever that may be.

But sometimes I start to run out of energy. My mental fortitude weakens. The time under tension is too long. If you’re under tension for a long time, it starts to feel normal. But it’s not normal. It’s dangerous.

The Best Medicine

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get into a routine and don’t even realize it, and this includes existing in a stressful state.

I have found that the most effective self-care tactic is to exercise. For me, it’s Muay Thai.

There is something incredibly therapeutic about punching and kicking the crap out of a heavy bag. Maybe it’s the primal aspect of it… “Me angry! Me hit things!”

You don’t have to buy all kinds of fancy fighting gear or join a smelly boxing gym, either. There are some boutique fitness gyms that specialize in boxing and kickboxing. The energy is great, facilities clean, and the workout will leave you feeling better physically and mentally. TITLE Boxing, Kickboxing.com, and CKO Kickboxing come to mind, but your city may have others.

The body and mind are connected. If they aren’t in sync, then that’s when I start to spiral a bit.

Most of the time my mind is taking care of my body, but every so often my body has to take care of my mind to relieve that time under tension.

#mindfulness